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Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
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hiirah-Mahiirraahh, 05/08/1991Loves Sushi&Chocolate. I'm a fan of Purple/Red/Yellow. I felt that night, on the stage, incredibly close to everything in the universe, but also extremely alone. I wondered, for the first time in my life, if life was worth all the work it took to live. What exactly made it worth it? What’s so horrible about being dead forever, and not feeling anything, and not even dreaming? What’s so great about feeling and dreaming? — Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close Talk it Loud
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©Glamouresque. |
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Don't make me cry... Whenever i got scolded it hurt my heart again... this time more... i will be 18 in august, and my parent disciplines has become more and more threatening... Whenever i get home late... Their thoughts have become negative. It's not like i came back home at midnight. That crazy. Whenever i'm on my way to home, they called me and told me something bad that want to make me kill myself. Like you better quit school... What a bad thing... i thought every parents want their child to school.. but-- i can't stand it anymore... It make me nearly cry... Why does my life has curfew... i know that i'm a girl and it is bad go home at night... Their nags and scolding has been added and added... Like WTF. This thing will make me more crazy... Especially my dumb father... I HATE HIM. He the one always make me cry and my mum too... it really hurts a lot... They may know how i feel towards the scolding but they don't know how my life has been by their scolding they had given... i know they love us... BUT PLEASE give me a break with it... When i get scolded by my DUMB DAd he likes to shout... i hate a lot... and he has a short temper... every single thing he shouts his hands is out of control... he likes to throw things... whenever he wanted to throw things to me i runaway to a room and started to cry loud... HE so stupid and say to me what for to cry... what a dumb reason is that.... when i told tem i wanted concelling they will say what for? to me this is too serious... i felt like troma in my head... it too stress... i do have my limit... but this is too much...too much... i cried and cried till i didn't have a voice to speak. my voice was sinking at that time... i nearly became crazy turn into unormal... that time when i cried i started to laugh then cry back then laugh then continue to cry... i was crazy at that time... i was in depression... i dun mind eatting 5 pills... My father always make me pissed off... whenever i i'm sleeping he disturb... and then he aske me too eat which i will delay it... he treat me like a little kid... he himself is like little kid... FuCk Off... i'm sorry to say this to mum but whenever you start to scolding me it make me heartbroken... Everytime... Mum why can't you understand my pain... and why, whenever i love japan groups or others... why japan is forbbiden for me... this is unfair... why can't i have a cool parents... why can't i have a good dad... why i chose chinese friends then the malay... you won't understand... for the malay, my classmates... I HATE THEM. for the chinese is so-so. i always by myself... that is why i try to be with my female friends... I, I just can't say anything... class has become more boring and my life too... and my teacher too can't understand how my life is through... i only wish to get more marks for the coming exam. that is what im worrying. but when i want to study there is always a disturbance. the thing that worry me is can i made it to exam and pass. thats the question... You may see me happy inside but worrying in the inside... in her heart she is always crying. |
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But baby, where they knock you down and out
Is where you oughta stay |
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